Today the water was shut off because Suzi neglected to pay the bill again. I had just gotten back from jiujitsu, stripped down, and was ready to jump into the shower. No water. I then the choice between putting my disgusting wet clothes back on, or dirtying a whole new set of clothes so that I could take a shower somewhere else, and then put on a third set of clothes.
After screaming, calling the water company, paying the bill, and being told they would not be able to turn the water on until the following day, I decided to take a shower at the gym, go to Kroger for gallons of water, and then pick up a half gallon of vodka and a pack of camel non-filters. This plan was absolutely set … I got fucking smashed each and every time Suzi neglected to pay the water bill in the past (7 – 8 times in the past two years). Only this time, I didn’t.
As angry as I was, ultimately, I am thankful for the opportunity to test my commitment to sobriety. I struggled all up until I knew there was no way to make it to CVS before midnight. I even ordered and paid for a pizza (and wings and pasta) at dominos and left to pick it up at 11:40, knowing that I would not have time to pick up my food and get booze. It would be one or the other. Even though I’d paid for the food, when I got to the redlight, left for booze, right for the food I’d already paid for, it was still a struggle.
I also still went to lowes and tried to get an exterior door (they were out), took my sister out to eat, and used online meetings to click the tock away. If I was able to make it through this evening without drinking, I may just have a chance.
